Lemme give you a little tip. Just because a large percentage of people take their mental issues out on their progeny, doesn't mean it is okay for you to assume it is happening or will happen. The fact is, some of us realized early in life that we don't want to inflict things on our children and have made a special effort to resolve as much as possible AND educate ourselves on how to properly raise healthy, well-adjusted children. No, really, some people put many, many years into this endeavor. I am definitely one of those people. So, when you meet me in the context of evaluating my delayed child and suggest to me that my past is probably contributing to her stress, without any knowledge of what my past actually is or what I have done about it, you're outta line!
Not only is it making some pretty broad assumptions but it feels like you're trying to blame me for my kid's delays. It also contributes to the b.s. idea people have that good parents raise smart children and bad parents raise problem/not perfect children. I was a very smart child. I learned to read around age 3. I was raised in a really crappy situation. Is my intelligence to blame for why people never believed that my home situation was crappy? I will be so thankful when my kids are old enough to tell people what a great mom I am. Maybe I look like I should be crappy on paper, but I know that my years of reading books on parenting, and therapy, and watching good families and getting to know my kids has turned me into a really good mom. Frankly, I'm offended that the subject even came up today.